“And don’t come out until you’ve accomplished spiritual growth,” Tenzin shouted as he locked the door to Korra’s room.
He had already moved her to a windowless room on the top floor, as if that alone would keep her inside. She actually thought it kind of cute that he thought locking the door would contain a nearly-mature Avatar. However, as there was no pro-bending that night, she decided to humor Tenzin and stay in.
She collapsed backwards onto her bed and stared up at the painted ceiling of her room. It struck her as ironic that an Air Nomad style building would contain such a confined space. It reminded her of Tenzin’s apparent rigidity, which was so incongruous with her understanding of the Air Nomads.
The ceiling was patterned with swirls of pale blues and greys, imitating the look of clouds before a summer rainstorm. She mentally traced the lines of color, mapping the “sky” in her head. She had never been so drawn to such subtle exercises as meditation, yet felt a sudden urge to try.
Without moving off her bed - indeed, without even sitting up, - Korra mentally centered herself, turning her thoughts inward.
—-
Korra opened her eyes, and found herself seated across from Tenzin. No. It wasn’t Tenzin, though there was a strong resemblance. The man seated across from her had a more familiar energy, like he and she were fundamentally connected.
This feeling of intimacy made his aura of disappointment all the more unsettling.
The man’s eyes were closed, and his form was relaxed, as though he was deep in meditation, yet he radiated tension.
Without opening his eyes, he addressed her: “You’re late.”
Korra was incredulous. She didn’t even know this man. Who was he to address her so? She replied, “Excuse me?”
He opened one eye, fixing her in half a disbelieving gaze. “Do you not know who I am?”
“I’ve never met you!”
“You are the Avatar.”
“Yeah, and who are you?”
Still with one eye fixed on her, the man stated simply, “I am the Avatar.”
Korra could not believe this. She was the Avatar. He had said so himself. She was losing her patience, but didn’t care if he knew. “I don’t think you understand what’s —-“
Suddenly, the man interrupted: “No! You don’t understand! You are the Avatar, but other Avatars came before you! We are a part of you! You should know who we are!”
She was dumbstruck. How could she not have recognized Avatar Aang? She lived on an island with a giant statue of him!
“I’m sorry, Avatar Aang. I should have recognized you.”
“And?”
And? Korra didn’t have an “and.” What more did Aang want from her?
She decided to guess. “And I’m sorry I was late?”
His one-eyed gaze was beginning to unsettle her.
“Why are you sorry for being late?”
“Because… it’s rude to keep people waiting?”
Aangs eyes were closed again, and his brow was furrowed.
A voice behind Korra broke the tense silence, “No. It is irresponsible to disregard the wisdom of your past lives. You should have attempted to contact us before now.”
She twisted around to face the speaker, a tall fire-Avatar she assumed was Roku.
“Well, I’m not really the spiritual type, and I thought I could handle things on my own. Things are different since you were Avatar. You wouldn’t understand.”
“Things are always different, and things are always the same. I was young once. So was Aang. We all have our own challenges to face. However, the Avatar has distinct spiritual responsibilities that you have been ignoring. I speak for all of us when I tell you, we expected better.”
What did they call this? It wasn’t possible that all the previous Avatars were disappointed in her. How could they not see that she was doing her best?
She turned back to Aang, who had not moved, but now there were Avatars everywhere. hundreds of past selves stood in a crowd around her, holding her in a single, stern stare.
“Look, I’ve got a lot on my plate right now! Republic City is in an uproar! People I love are in danger, but trying to save them could kill me! Do you know what that’s like?”
A water-Avatar near the front of the crowd responded, “A spirit stole my fiance’s face to punish me for my arrogance. I’ve tried to kill that spirit many times, but I have yet to succeed. I risked, and I failed, but the dangers of life are greater than any one person, and the cycle goes on.”
“Well, my life is complicated! The world is a different place! I don’t have the kind of stable support networks you all had! I really like this guy, but he’s dating one of my friends, and his brother is really into me, but I’m not into him! I’m tip-toeing around a lot of delicate relationships, and one wrong move could cause them all to collapse!”
Roku stepped forward, “My best friend watched me suffocate to death in a pyroclastic flow, in order to secure the Fire Nation’s imperialist wants. His betrayal of my trust lead to the genocide of the Air Nomads and the 100 year war. Next?”
“My mentor is completely out of touch! He doesn’t understand the challenges I face as the Avatar against the Equalists! He’s completely—-“
Aang interrupted again, “Have you considered the challenges the Equalists face in a society that glorifies bending? Whether or not you agree with their methods, you must attempt to understand their struggle. It is the job of the Avatar to maintain balance in the world, regardless of where the imbalance resides. If an imbalance exists between benders and non-benders, you must find a solution that satisfies all. Silencing those who oppose you makes you no better than they are.”
Korra couldn’t believe what she was hearing. She loved bending, she loved being the Avatar, and, at any moment, Amon could take that all away from her. No other Avatar had faced that risk.
And here were all the other Avatars, telling her she wasn’t any better than the Equalists.
Korra stood up, and shouted to the Avatars, “You hypocrites! You’ve all had your own struggles, sure, faced your own demons, but this is something different. Maybe you lost your face, but you didn’t lose your self. If I lose my bending, what am I? Am I still the Avatar? I don’t even know! I —-“
This time, it was an earth-Avatar that interrupted. She said, “Without spiritual knowledge, you are not fully the Avatar. The physical ability to master all elements is only one aspect of the Avatar’s power. You cannot restore balance to the world until you find balance in yourself.”
This pushed Korra over the edge. “Don’t tell me how to be the Avatar! I am the Avatar, and I can do this on my own! You are the past. Not the present, not the future! If you won’t help me, I will do this without you —-“
The other Avatars were muttering amongst themselves, and the sound grew in strength as Korra went on. Then, a single, soft voice cut through the rabble. Aang said, “We are trying to help you.”
Korra lunged at him, and was surprised when he repelled her.
She went flying back, crashing into the Avatars behind her. They caught her, and held her fast while the other Avatars advanced. Though her spirit was intense and emotional, it was not strong, and she could not break free of their grasp.
Each Avatar that approached her struck some kind of blow: yes, she was kicked, hit, headbutted, crushed with stones, burned with fire, pelted with hail, and whipped by gusts of wind, but each physical blow carried a mental and spiritual note. As the Avatars assaulted her, they poured thoughts, memories, and experiences into her.
Soon, she was overcome by physical and mental anguish, but the blows continued to fall. She felt completely Kuruk’s grief over his wife. She mourned the loss of Roku’s nation, and the betrayal he felt at the hands of his friend. She saw Monk Gyatso’s skeleton at the Southern Air Temple, and was overcome by Aang’s loneliness. These, and a thousand other memories, coursed through her.
Korra had no idea when it all stopped. When she opened her eyes, she was lying on her bed in the windowless room. The pillow was damp from tears, and her entire body ached. She didn’t want to move, but knew that her wants didn’t matter.
She had to call a council meeting to discuss new strategies for dealing with the Equalists, and hope that she wouldn’t disappoint the Avatars again.
